Change a couple of the auto-dial numbers around. People using speed dial
rarely hang around to check it goes to the right place. Could be really
funny for competetive suppliers.
Fax machine II
Change the transmission ID. Most modern fax machines send and identifcation
string which is usually the company name. All the outgoing faxes would be
shown as coming from, instead of BIG Corp ltd, Madam Zaza's Sex toys Ltd.
Photocopiers and printers
For best effect you will need one of those rubber stamps for [BOLLOCKS]
or [FILE UNDER BULLSHIT]. Carefully open a couple of packs of paper and
at convenient points stamp the chosen phrase all over one side of the paper.
There is a 50% chance that side of the paper wont get looked at before the
letter gets posted.
Manuals and handbooks
If you have access to all the manuals for a software package. Why not
take a glue stick and stick together all the pages covering installation
or some other rarely performed but important section.
Many offices have height adjustable chairs. The levers for adjusting the
height can be fixed in the up position by attaching cable ties. This is
only mildly irritating unless you hide all the wire-cutters/scissors.
Put some food in the desk of the most annoying person in the office, lock it
up and put a GOOD glue in the keyhole. Araldite or other glue without a
readily available solvent is best. In a week or so the fish/chicken tikka
sandwich should be quite noticeable.
Some people dont ever tidy their desks so you could be able to hide it under
the mountains of paper and junk in their drawers.
Paint the underside with burglar paint, engine oil, mayonaise, the worlds your
Re-direct all the incoming calls to a suitable extension and glue up the
button needed to transfer calls.
Sellotape the handsets down on suitable phones. Picture the busy executive
snatching for the receiver and sending the phone crashing to the floor.
what better start to his/her monday morning.
open the handset and drop something smelly inside, could be about 6
crumbled incense sticks or a peice of crap, depends on the target.
Fill in all those Free-post cards from the magazines like black-box and
panel-beaters weekly for free subscriptions. One for every body should
be a pleasant way to spend a rainy afternoon. You can get cards for the
more obscure ones from your local library.
Pour a little salt into any plants around your targets desk. He/She will
probably get blamed for over watering them.
Does your target make regular backups of complete crap. See if you can attach
a powerful magnet to the underside of the desk drawer that the disks are kept
in. If the drawers are made of wood 5 or 6 drawing pins should give the
magnet somthing to stick to. This may never be noticed as backups are rarely
used, but they are even more rarely checked once they have been put away
for "safe keeping"
If your target has a roller blind, staple a suitable poster to the blind and
roll it up to conceal the poster. Should be funny when the next sunny day
These respond quite well to the glue stick treatment. Picture again the
target on the phone (filled with dog shit) saying "Hold on I'll check my
schedule for the week beginning the 7th, Oh shit its all stuck together"
Less irritating but still worthy of consideration is emptying the circles
from the hole punch into the diary. When the target flips the diary open
the things shower all over the desk.
Use the rubber stamp (See Photocopiers above) to obliterate a week of future
Hmm must be on a roll here.
Use a white wax crayon or candle to rub across the pages at intervals. This
makes the pages very difficult to write on.
These can be great fun if the power plugs are switched around at the
wall/floor socket. Suddenly the cleaner unplugs the percolator and
the main computer goes down. Also fun if when Employee A goes home and
switches off his machine at the same old wall point, Employee B's computer
goes off instead.
Does your office have those ceiling tiles that hide an ugly set of girders
holding up the next floor above. The ceiling tiles can be spiced up by
putting a 1 pound bag of flour on top, just lift a free tile put the bag on
the back of the next tile. When the electricians come in to change light
bulbs etc. the bags fall out and make a good sized mess. If you are worried
about braining some sap wil a bag of flour just pour the flour in a heap on
the back of the tile, still makes a mess.
Boring magazines in reception
Glue some Porno-action pictues in at regular intervals to liven then up.