The Fixer presents...

PRANKS, REVENGE, AND GENERAL MAYHEM: VOLUME TEN

This issue: Framing your enemies - An Effective Revenge Tactic

Well, in the past I have dealt with framing people in a very small way, e.g. planting weed in your neighbor's garden, placing drugs or liquor in a buddy's locker, etcetera. When someone narcs on you, the best revenge is always to use the system to which they suck up to, against them and for your own benefit. Therefore this file will detail some advanced ways to get someone into all the trouble they deserve, and without implicating you!
HIGH-TECH VOICE & AD FRAME JOBS: Did you ever see the movie "Used Cars"? Where the used car lot is almost shut down in court because a guy hired by the lot across the street modified a TV commercial (thru ingenious splicing) so that it contained many obvious lies, thus making people complain of false advertising? Well, there are several different levels on which YOU can do this. First, the easiest. Put an ad in the paper with an enemy company's logo and phone number, so that it looks just like one of their ads. But use slightly different text than they do. Make sure to blatantly slander their competition (yourself, maybe?) so that there is NO WAY that they could "get away with" the ad. Make sure that you know the name of the target company's ad person in case the newspaper asks. Also, if they ask for a phone number, don't give them your number or the target company's. Give them a Loop (consult BIOC 003's files for instruction on how to use these). Now, the slightly harder one. This is basically the same technique used in "Used Cars", only it's for a Radio commercial instead. What you do is, using a HIGH QUALITY radio receiver and tape recorder, record a new ad played over the radio. The recording has got to be STUDIO QUALITY so use either the most expensive cassettes you can get, or better yet, use a reel to reel machine. Also, make sure there is NO radio noise on the recording. Now, simply find a word in the pitch that would be slanderous or a preposterous claim if only ONE syllable were taken out. In "Used Cars" they changed "SMILES" to "MILES" and almost got them for claiming to have "MILES of cars" which they did not. With a little creativity and a sharp ear you too can find something damaging deep within ANY commercial. Now, once the tape is modified thru creative splicing (and make sure that it sounds natural, for chrissakes), take the tape to a radio station that is not playing the ad. Have the bill for advertising sent to the target company (of course). After awhile, the competition of the target company will be taking the target to court over false advertising, or a disgruntled customer perhaps. The Toughie: Here's one that requires GOOD sound digitizing equipment (like, one of the new-generation 32-bit micros with LOTS of memory and special speech-digitization hardware. (Get a REAL computer. Get a Mac ][.)) You tape-record the voice of an enemy or of a local radio announcer until you have a large amount of high-quality speech. Now, you use your digitizer to extract and digitize a whole array of speech phonemes, in various inflections. If the digitizer is good, you will be able to capture speech that is indistinguishable from the original. Now, use these phonemes to create whatever text YOU want your enemy or your target's commercial to say. If your target is a person, publicly broadcast (thru a PA system or whatever) incriminating conversations in the guy's voice. If the target is a company, then submit your new-improved commercial to a radio station as detailed above. Toughest, but easy for those with the hardware: If you can get access to the abovementioned digitizing computer, and to 3/4 inch video recording equipment (or better, but NOT VHS, BETA, or 8MM), you can also modify some television commercials. Just capture a commercial on the 3/4 inch video, modify its sound track as detailed above, and send it to a TV station that isn't playing the commercial. There are restrictions though: The commercial must be of the type that has an announcer and/or music in the background with no lips moving on the part of the person who is talking. In the above tactics, it is also important to have a voice-remover box handy, if there is music in the background. What you do is, digitize your recorded phonemes, use the voice remover to produce a tape recording of the music alone, 'sans vox', and then dub-over your digitized "new" commercial. If you construct the phonemes into words right, you should come up with a very authentic sounding commercial, except that it is going to get "someone" in a whole mess of trouble.
A POSSIBILITY: If there was still a Draft, a possible tactic would be to check your target's mailbox every morning before he does, and if a letter from the U.S. Army ever came, to run off with his Draft notice. As a Canadian, I am not sure of the time span involved in waiting for the consequences (we have no Draft here) but it seems to me that this trick would eventually produce MP's at the front door of said target. This is just a thought for my American readers.....
A CASE STUDY IN ANTI-FRAMING REVENGE: When I was in grade 8, I was in this boarding school (only I didn't board there because it was in my hometown). Well, there was this mega-nerd from Seattle there who hated my guts. So one day, I find myself sitting in the Dean's office accused of mugging this idiot downtown on the weekend. Well, the geek's frame job was so shoddy that it took me about 5 minutes to convince the Dean that the idiot was fucking the Dean and me around. So, I was scot-free and the geek was never trusted again. That is what I took advantage of: The very next day, I saw him downtown and beat the living crap out of him in the street. Naturally he went narking to the Dean again, but this time he just got an instant "Bull Shit" from the Dean. You see, when someone tries to frame you for personal damage, if you manage to convince the authorities that you are innocent, consider yourself free to actually do whatever it is you are framed for, because the next time, your framer will be called the boy-who-cried-wolf. No one takes an exposed framer seriously. (So be careful!)
Call........ TOMMY'S HOLIDAY CAMP BBS: 604-595-0085 THE NEUTRAL ZONE 10 MEGS: 604-478-1363 B.C. TEL PHONE MART GBBS: 604-658-1586 THE METAL A.E. P/W: KILL: 201-879-6668

-- swift vengeance