The Fixer presents...

PRANKS, REVENGE, AND GENERAL MAYHEM: VOLUME ELEVEN

This lesson: Destroying an Apple!

In previous articles I have written many techniques for revenge through sabotage. In addition to my thousands of Krazy Glue Tricks (only a few of which have actually been posted in files), I have devised a great many sabotage techniques for animate and inanimate objects. However, these were generally rather basic due to a desire to fit as many into one file as possible. Now, those days are over as I write larger, more helpful files. So, then, here is Pranks 11: Advanced Sabotage 1 - How to Destroy an Apple Computer.
HOW TO BLOW UP AN APPLE COMPUTER: Anyone can blow up anything with a stick of dynamite and a fuse or det-box. But what we have here is the most exquisite way known to destroy an Apple computer. The reason I picked Apple is NOT just because I hate them, but because they are very easy to get inside of, and there is lots of room inside for a bomb or whatever. This tactic will actually work for any machine, but if you don't want to turn the machine upside down and unscrew god-knows-how-many-screws, wasting time that you probably don't have, then use an Apple. Anyways, down to it. Make a bomb with an electrical igniter that lights when 6 volts are applied to it. Smoke bombs are great for computers; they quite nicely fuck up a computer's board and make the machine smoke like hell too. The effect is great, especially if you pick either a brand-new (never used) machine or one that has had many hardware problems in the past. Now, attach the igniter leads to the switched +12 supply and ground. Close the computer. As soon as the machine is turned on, its doom is sealed as the bomb ignites. It may even let out its initial BEEP before its ROMs get melted. If you are really destructive, go to high school, and don't mind your school not having any computer science department anymore, then this may be for you: If all the machines in the school's computer room are connected to a master switch, and all go on when the switch is thrown, then it would be a tremendous coup if you could (at a time when the machines are off) plant a smoke bomb or other bomb in EACH machine. Oh, here's a good one: if you can find or make an electrical igniter that will go off with the current from the Annunciator output of the Apple, then you have the potential to create some really professional havoc. Simply attach the bomb to an annunciator line and ground, and then leave a disk lying around that says "Great New Wares" on it. This is a great follow-up to my infamous sandpaper diskette. What the disk contains is, a whole bunch of really big files (the magic of sector editors) with the name a new ware on them, and a 2 sector one named HELLO. After perusing the catalog, the sucker will naturally boot up the ware. HELLO will then boot up what appears to be a nice crack screen, with the warning that if a certain peripheral is hooked up, the system will crash (name a peripheral that is plugged into the target machine). Give JUST enough pause time that the guy at the machine can read it, then have the annunciator to which you have attached your bomb activated, just as a text message saying "PIRATE COPY ---- SYSTEM SUSPENDED" comes on the screen. Immediately massive billowing clouds of smoke will pour out of the machine and the guy will freak, telling stories of how such-and-such a protection scheme can ACTUALLY SET THE MACHINE ON FIRE if you mess with it. (Only a r0dent would actually believe such a thing, but the response you could elicit is well worth the try). If you can't find an igniter that will go off under the current from an annunciator, or if you are blowing up a different machine whose programmable outputs of whatever type have very little current output, then wire up a relay with the +12 supply or a battery that CAN do the job. +12 or battery I I +--------IIII-----+ + I I + + + + + + + +--* + * ignitor + +--* + + / + + / + +------ O--------- relay sw. @@@@@@@ relay coil + + + + + + gnd. annunciator
NOTE: These techniques will work with superior computers such as the Timex Sinclair, but the effect is not as good.
This file was written June 1987 by the Fixer, when he still had a Commodore. Rumor has it he's wised up and is getting a //e in Jan. It is a response to "How to crash a Comodork BBS", one of which T.F. still happens to run...
Call: TOMMY'S HOLIDAY CAMP 604-595-0085 BC TEL PHONE MART 604-658-1586 THE NEUTRAL ZONE 604-478-1363 HEART OF GOLD 604-658-1581 THE METAL AE 201-879-6668 DARQUESIDE AE 408-245-7726

-- swift vengeance